A Whiter Shade of Pale - Procol Harum (1967) & Life of Agony
We skipped the light fandango
Turned cartwheels cross the floor
I was feeling kinda sea-sick
But the crowed called out for more
The room was pounding harder
As the ceiling flew away
When we called out for another drink
The waiter brought the tray
And so it was the later
As the miller told his tale
That her face at first just ghostly
Turned a whiter shade of pale
She said there is no reason
And the truth is plain to see
But I'll wander through my playing cards
Would not let her be
One of 16 vestal virgins
Who were leaving for the coast
And although my eyes were open
They might just as well have been closed
A Saturday at the Office.......
Numb!
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertone just caught in the undertone)
Every step I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertone just caught in the undertone)
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I've becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
(Caught in the undertone just caught in the undertone)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertone just caught in the undertone)
And every second I waste is more than I can take
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I've becoming this all I want to doIs be more like me and be less like you
And I know
I may end up failing too
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I've becoming this all I want to doIs be more like me and be less like you
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
(Tired of being what you want me to be)
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
(Tired of being what you want me to be)
Hurricane Season!
Well, everyone has posted postings about weather, especially the snow in the Northern hemisphere. My one buddy still back on the island is in a mind of his own over the hurricane season (cyclone in the indian ocean, dick head). So, I decided to post something about a stormy situation as well..... This posting is dedicated to my beloved and dear Indian buddy in Mauritius....Nachi Bru, this is just for you!
The day that a hurricane struck KOLKATA........Well, this wasn't too long ago. In fact, it was only yesterday, Friday the 25th November 2005. A day that affected so many people in a country where people whatched with disbelieve of a devasted hurricane, called Graeme Smith, ruined the lives and broken the hearts of almost 1.5 billion Indians. It didn't matter where they stayed, India, Tanzania, Mauritius, Durban (South Africa) or in America, I can guarantee you their lives will be affected for years to come.
The result of this storm was so devasted where some of the major countries in the world could actually only sit back and watched helplessly how this storm, that derived from our very own most southernest tip of Africa went up all along the indian ocean right up to KOLKATA and caused major, but major havoc. The first thing which came to mind was the well being of a very good and loyal friend of mine that is based in Mauritius. I actually really wanted to call him to find out if he is doing OK and wanted to offer my support and strength to overcome this really hard and sad period in his life now and to know that he can always rely on me as being his friend even though we are thousands of kilometers apart, I will always be a phone call or email away. To his unfortunate luck, the Tanzanian telecommunication network was of a third world quality and like usual, out of operation.
This storm struck the mainland of India around 11 am CAT on Friday 25th November 2005 and demolished the town of KOLKATA where the Indian Cricket Board or the Indian Goverment could do nothing to prevent this storm, but only stand by and watched as the onslaught lasted for a full 6 fucking hours as the hearts of 1.5 billion loyal supporters was shattered into 3 billion pieces. The Indian prince of the cricket world (Sachin Tendulkar) could do nothing at all and only contributed 2.........only 2 fucking sleezy runs. Yes my dear loyal readers, I'm talking of a hurricane that stood the strength of time. The South African Cricket team that demolished the world renown Indian cricket team with a first partnership record of 189 runs at KOLKATA and a personal best for Graeme Smith (134 runs from 124 balls) and a record for the highest individual score of 134 at KOLKATA, Eden Gardens. I do not know what was so Eden about this garden, but I can only imagine that it could have been hell for the Indian population. South Africa (No. 2 in the world rankings) beat the Indian side by 10 wickets. India who only accomplished this 4 times in their cricket history, twice by South Africa........
What can I say my Indian fellow humans, life has to go on. My heart really goes out for the 1.5 billion people that had to endure this record breaking onslaught and this will be definately a day that India would like to forget quickly, but unfortunately it will be in the back of their minds for years to come.
May the South African force be with all of you.
Words of Wisdom!
From my boy Timo...
... anyways cats and women will do as they please and men and dogs should just get used to it .....
Up Tight & Personal!
Well, you all know me.......A T-shirt and Camel Shorts are all that I need, but for this one it was a quite different dress code. Representing (not by choice, but brutal force) my company as Deputy Contract's manager (since Dirk is in fucking Paris and whatching South Africa vs. France in rugby on Stade Francaise in Paris on Saturday, 26 November 2005) in a quite upper class function with the French Ambassador (whom is a lady if I may add).
This function was basically a typical French party (Wine, Cheese and a lot of fucking french speaking people) where I knew no one, except for some guys that I work with and a couple of familiar public faces. As usual, I was early and waited outside the gate with a couple of "SLY/Rambo" looking french marines. This is one thing that really pisses me off. Small little fuckers that looks like mean dudes that carries some sort of weapon, martial arts or TV's under their armpits. Anyway, this big South African Boer is loaded with some martial arts myself.....It's called don't piss me off or I will fucking head butt you....At least I was on my best behaviour, just walking with very broad shoulders like the rest of the tiny french crack bitches......Anyway.
Once we entered the embassy it was loaded with WHITE people. I have never seen so many foreigners in one place at the same time and the biatches, well, fucking good looking as well. Every one started to chat with me in french and I'm made them speak English if they really wanted to speak to me. At least there was a couple who gave it a go. The first thing I did was to get a table and after we seated, I decided that it was time for a "cold one" to calm the nerves. Actually it turned out to be 4 of the those 500ml bottles. I decided that we needed to dish up, because if we wanted to eat we should hurry up before everyone comes in and then there was no food at all or a fucking long que. Man, I told Denis (who is by the way a colleague of mine) that he shouldn't be shy with taking food. It was for free.......He started to dish up and I started to crack myself as I was laughing. It look like this guy was mountainering with the amount of food that he dished up. So, just to be fair to him as well, he dished up for him and his Kenyan girl.
But, like I've said earlier that there was only wine & cheese which was in the majority, but at least they thought of the carnivores as well. A shit load of different cold meat, duck liver paté and my favourite, thin sliced cold viel. The only problem is that all the different food put together was quite salty. No wonder why these bastards always look so sour........We enjoyed the food and then it was time for Live Stage performances. They flew in a guy who is from South of France who they call Monsieur Bean Francais.......Mr (French)Bean....This guy looked like the real thing and he was probably even more fucking nuts than the real one. But I have to admit I had a good couple of laughs.......At 10pm I decided that it was time to hit the road (65km of the african road) back home to my bush.
So, it was really a nice party and a good gettaway for a "Mittwoch" and I do feel the fatigue in my bones this morning. Great fun, weird people, shit cheeses and loads of naked woman (in my head at least).
Check out my photoblog, some of my latest pics available.........Ciao!
Forfeit that What Once Was!
It was yet one of those weeks where I krept into my mind and did a lot of soul searching. It was not about anything/anyone special but me. Like my friend always like to remind me that I'm special and Unique.....but yet somehow I do stand alone in this world determining the extent of my destiny.
At this point of time, I do not want to mention too much, but it is definately one of those decisions that will defintely determine if I could be satisfied at a latter stage. There are no guarantees and a maybe too much sacrifices, but it is something I believe in. Something that determined who I was for so long and something that might reunite me with thought/dream that I came to love. No, I'm not talking about my relationship/ex-relationship with Edina, but to some extent it does concern her in a very weird way. I'm thinking in a way that this decision could maybe bring some satisfaction to my needs that I fought for so long......
I'm a person that do make a lot of impulsive decisions, but this one took me a real long time to really understand to what extent I need to go to prove to myself that well. I always believe that you need to do something if you really believe in it and it could benefit a lot of people in a good and positive way. We are all alone in this world and we need to take care of ourselves otherwise will do it for us? We are all put on this earth, because of a reason and the people you love are only there to help, support and guide you through your life, but at the end, you were born alone and you will die alone. So this is what basically determines the "REAL YOU". To find the strength to do something that you purely believe in.
This decision took me to the very lows and in a way to some sort of highs. So much so that I could not do it on my own and searched for guidence. The way I'm living my life is based on inner happiness. To find the ways how to control the level of internal happiness. Of coarse different things give people a different level of happiness and not one of us are the same, but what makes me happy is really important to me.
I went to a Budhist Temple over the past weekend to try and convince myself that what I'm doing is the right thing. I've spoken to the MONK and somehow I found comfort and guidance in his words of wisdom. The big thing is that I do not really believed in any religion and he confirmed just by the way that Budhism is not a religion, but a life style. A lifestyle that controls personal satisfaction and happiness if you live by it. I'm not a Budhist, but I do believe in some of their ways. He took me into this temple and we kneeled down in front of the Buddah statue and explained to me that one can only make the right decisions in life if you are totally calm and your mind at rest. For the past couple of weeks my mind was just running and for the first time I was really calm. Somehow I battled to keep all the thoughts out of my mind when I sat down and started meditating. First of all, I was really uncomfortable sitting down with strangers and they pray to something/someone that I know very little about. But at this one point I was really calm and my mind was so clear of everything that bothered me for so long. It was like I was sleeping, but not sleeping at all and I heard nothing around me at all. It was just me & me alone. Feeling the calmness that I so dearly missed for so long in my life and that feeling, OH man, that feeling felt just so perfect and I wished that I could go on with that forever.
I know forever is a very long time, but I was in a place where I did not have to fear anyone, where I did not have any problems or important decisions to make. A place where I had no pain and no goals or a place where I did not have to think of anyone except of myself. This was really amazing and when I opened my eyes I just knew what was the right dicision..... It was really just so forfilling......I wish I could show you guys that place, but it is definately a place that you need to find for yourselves. I do not have any words at all, but AMAZING.....So this was my BIG lesson for this weekend......
I met up with this one Italian dude, that live in South Africa for 20 years and 5 years in Germany......I wish you guys could hear how this guy spoke about Germany.....I could feel his passion your country.....Really, really amazing talk. If there is something/someone that made me really want to come to Germany, it was this guy.....Thanks Frank.....
It's so cute of you helping me!! thanks a lot bru ...
I received an email this morning from a very dear friend of mine....I could never even have imagined people picking up my Afrikaans/English South African dialect and use it in their daily conversations. I mean, just look at the heading, this email could have been from Anne, Uma, Jess, Nachi or anyone else that knows me from the island....."Bru" became a synonum for brother, my boy, my buddy or just anyone that is very close to you. It is so sweet gal! Man, I wish you guys knew actually how much I miss you. This posting is only based on random thoughts that are jurking in my mind probably for the last couple of months.
There probably is not one single day that goes by that I do not think about what happened back on the island. I like to call it the place of broken dreams. Who would have thought that I really would have enjoyed that island as much as I did. I remember at one stage where the talk of the town was how these bitchass Mauritian guys make the gals fall to their knees for them only to get a passport out that place.....But then I think back of all the amazing times I had with different groups of people. The last 18 months have been really amazing and now it needs to end. OK, it did end for me, but I can not stop to think of everyone that I've met there. Man, there has to be at least 30 people that I can really call my closest friends to this day whom are now spread all over the world.
It was really so amazing last night when I was chatting with Uma on SKYPE and at the same time I found her house back in USA on Google Earth and I could look right into her backyard. The resolution was really that good and then I wonder really how small this world is. On Sunday a friend of mine picked me up from Johannesburg International Airport and he came along with a primary school buddy of his and can you believe that this guy is the step brother of my Contracts Manager in Tanzania. What are the fucking chances....? Then I sit here and wonder when I will ever see all my friends again. And then I start to smile 'cause I know I'm only a couple of hours away from each and everyone of them.
I know the only thing that can prevent me from seeing them, is my work. Priorities....What is priorities? My priorities differ from each and everyone else's priorities and the way I feel right now, I can just can get on a fucking plaine and do whatever I like to do......I wish it was really that simple. I do have a career to think off, but at the same time I'm just so tired emotionally and physically. I feel like a wreck and I feel like I've burned out totally and I do not have any energy to motivate myself to do something constructive. In SA I pumped myself with a couple B12 injections and swollowed a lot of Vitamin C tablets, but your body knows when it's really time to take off. I do not even think 10 days will be enough to sort out this wreck. I'm thinking more in the lines of 2 months at least.
Then I start to think what I really want in life. I mean, I'm really so confused after Mauritius. Before I went I was only committed to my work and more work and now it feels like I lost my grip in life. I know I'm still young and I do have a long stretch to do (hopefully), but where I come from if you do not start young, you will not make it all. That's the truth! I sit here and think maybe take it day by day and hopefully it will get better soon. But somehow I do not even have the energy to wake up tomorrow morning.....Then I know all my friends around the globe are struggling in some way or another and then I think to myself....Stop bitch. Stop fucking moaning...There are people out there that really have bigger problems and then I just fucked up my whole reason for writing this posting.....But I think I've said what was on my mind and end this posting and go home and go whatch TV. Hopefully the electricity will not go off again. Luckily for the site to have a genset......So then I do have internet and that makes me smile......So, guys, Have fun this weekend and I do miss you all......Tschuss!
Words of Faith!
Faith means taking the first step even when you can't see the rest of the staircase!
Letting It All Go!
Hey guys, sorry for the late posting. But, only returned to Tanzania about 4 hours ago and now I will do a total recap of my visit to island of broken dreams.
Well, I left Tanzania on the Thursday 3rd November and spent the night back in South Africa with some good old friends. Nothing fancy about my stop over in South Africa except for shopping at Johannesburg International Duty free. I have develloped a real sense of flying, because everytime I get onto an aeroplane, I fell asleep before the plane even took off. Catching myself waking up with my snoaring and there was one moment on my return flight from Mauritius to South Africa where I sat once again next to Old Germans and was woken up by a comment in German because of my snoaring. The lady next to me said out loudly "Sheiße" and then I knew I had to wake up, because everyone on the plain's dreams and excitement was spoiled by my snoaring......So, enough about this shit. Do you think I give a shit about it any way?
So, I landed in Mauritius on the 4th November and I was the first one out of the plaine & customs just to feel how it was really to be back home. I flew with Air Mauritius from South Africa to Mauritius and of coarse they do supply PHOENIX on board. I took full advantage of this opportunity and the SPANISH/AMERICAN hot babe next to me probably thought that I was an alcoholic. OK, I did misbehave by sucking these beer cans thinking it was some hot chicks tits (mother's milk), but hey, it was 7 weeks since I had a PHOENIX...... So, Kevin & Wolfgang picked me up from the airport with Fröschle and I had to force old poor Wolle to give me the keys (eventhough I had to use some hard unacceptible verbal language). Poor old Fröschle was driven like a rally car back home and my first stop had to be Buddah of coarse. After a beer and the excitement moving down to my stomache muscles, we went to Shez Pepe for pizza. I met up with the rest of the german gang, Jorn and Kerstin, and did we have fun updating each other with my life in Tanzania and the happenings in Mauritius. Let just say the night went on 'till late the next morning.
Saturday, well, I had to get wheels. Knowing that the island is boaring without any wheels and afterwards Kevin and I went to pick up Wolle and headed for Tamarin. I had to stop at the French Butchery for some local biltong and then we hitted the road again for "Rosseau Creole" in Tamarin for some Billabong shopping and beer at lunch time. I went to show Wolle & Kevin the beach at Tamarin where the old Museum was and it was beautiful. We hitted back home for some more beer and a bit of a chill out. I spent some time with Uma and I had to say she really looked excited going home although that she was still ill. Saturday evening we went out for some steak and beer at the restaurant next to the French Butchery and still I ate barely nothing. Since the Friday night I gave all my food away and can you believe that I even gave Kevin my beer. I guess my nerves were packing up! The night, we went to Buddah with the German boys.
Sunday, well, I woke up quite late due to the festings of the night before and this was the day we celebrated Uma's departure. Well, I have to admit that I was happy that she was leaving, but also sad. I was happy because I knew it was something that she wanted to do, but I was sad because I couldn't see her anymore and I still don't know when I will again. Everything that happened on this night was posted in my earlier posting, So, if you didn't read it, you SHOULD! Let just say we went through the night with basically without sleeping and Monday morning was really hard at work. We had a surpise visit from my old friend Joel and Nachi misbehaved as usual. Bastard!
Well, the sad part was that I ended up working everyday of the week, but I dedicated my evenings independantly to each of my friends. Whether it was at Buddah, Kenzi or just staying home. Kerstin took up the hospitalty issue by cooking an amazing meal one night although she offered to do it more than once. Amazing girl.......and amazing people all together. By Wednesday I started to prepare myself for one of my saddest moments in my life and that was to say goodbye to the island and it was not 'till Saturday evening it really caught me.
Tuesday morning was one of the more sad moments when I had to drive Uma to the airport. It was almost as bad as driving Edina to the Airport twice! Anyway, Friday afternoon I dedicated my day to the start of the German Carnival in Dusseldorf and was this a day to remember. Let me just put it to you like this. Friday afternoon 2pm, one of the warmer sunshining days during my stay on the island. Friday the 11th of the 11th month at 11:11 on the watch the party started. Kevin & Wolle actually started earlier and I joined in after shopping for the BRAAI and I fell in at 2pm. Lars, Jorn & Kerstin joined at 5pm I think ('cause time wasn't an issue at this point anymore). We spent the whole day in the heavy chlorinated pool (I think the mauritians over chlorinated the pool to disinfect all the pissing in the pool because of all the beer, kidding) with lots of PHOENIX, DIEBELS (German altbeer) and german carnival music with one phrase that I will not forget for the rest of my life and it was a song about a horse on the fucking floor....what horse shit was this? Anyway, It was a day to remember. Lars brought charcoal and blue spirits to start the fire and I was actually not very happy about the spiritis, but I took it upon myself to start the fire.
At one moment the fumes of the bottle that stood next to the fire caught fire and it went like a rocket. The flaming side of the bottle towards the German who was seated at the table and the spirits bottle the opposite direction. Kevin caught fire and his new T-Shirts that he just bought this day was burning on his back and I just pulled it off and we all whatched as the shirts was burning out. I think he wasn't injured at all, but this was really a shocking experiance. Jorn and Kerstin went to SPAR and broke Fröschle key off inside the door. Later, the fucking Italian (Alex), Richard (with sweet lisa), Anja (the german chick who loves to drink tea in the afternoon), Jake the American and a belgium crazy almost rasta dude joined us after the BRAAI and we headed afterwards to Buddah. Yet, another late next morning party! Wolle took his German carnival music with to Buddah and fuck (I've listened to this CD at least 20 times during the day) at he got it played at the Buddah's night club another 2 times at least 'till Anja had enough of it and told the DJ to change the music.......Sorry Anja, I'm not fond of German chicks from the East Side anymore....Experianced enough of grieve before.....
Wolle wasn't too happy about Anja's actions and left home early eventhough I honestly think he had enough to drink. So, at around 3am Jorn decided to go and show the Belgium guy the inside of Summer Beach club and they charged us 150rupees to enter. No fucking way was I willing to pay that amount of money to see that fucking shit club. So, we all decided to go sit on the beach and whatched the full moon over Flic en Flaq beach. It was amazing and we all were drunk....with the Belgium dude speaking shit about smoking weed in Amsterdam and that Amsterdam should be the Capital of the world because of the naked chicks and primerely because of the coffee shops with the weed menues. Uhm....LECKER.....
Saturday I spent the morning in Port Louis doing some shopping for Dirk and the family and the afternoon Jorn, Wolle and
I went to shoprite, because Wolle wanted to buy some fishing accessories. I waited outside and one moment I decided to go in into GAME to go and look for a CD of Robbie Williams with the song "MISUNDERSTOOD". As I walked into the shop, I heared this French song that I was looking for so long and to cut a long story short, I copied the demo CD in GAME, by buying a clean CD and using a the laptop for SALE on the shelf and I copied the CD for only 200rupees. Amazingly Africa, uhm?
Afterwards we went out for my last dinner at Shez Pepe where I got at this stage very sad leaving. I made a promise to Kerstin that I will come to Germany when she returns from the UK and she will come to Tanzania during Germany's SPRING season and I will show her all the wild animals and I mean, all the wild animals here. Elephants is what she probably will want to come and see. So, It looks like I need to prospone my trip Germany in February to around May 2006 (my birthday month). Afterwards we went to Kenzi where we met up with Joel and afterwards with Anja and I think I need to apologise to Anja for all my cheecky remarks....Bru, nothing personal, but I needed to pick on someone otherwise my sadness would have gotten the best of me. No hard feelings chick from the East Side.....? Who Cares? So, the surprisingly amazing news is that my boy, Joel, is a professional now writing as a journalist for the "Le Martinal". Boy, keep up the good work.
So, Joel and I tried to stay awake for most of the night, but I guess we fell asleep around 5am Sunday morning and Jorn & Kevin took the honours to drive me to the airport and I have to sadly now that this island is forever gone for me.....It just needs to be. My buddies on the island, Guys, you are all amazing people and thanx for everything and I will definately see you guys next year in Germany. May the force be with all of you. Sunday I returned to South Africa where I met up with some friends and just in time for a lekker party and a fucking cold swimming pool. Monday I was back in the office in South Africa and I returned today to Tanzania where I will be stuck for a while and just maybe not........
That was it......Check out my photoblog for some pictures!
Misunderstood!
Tryin' to be misunderstood
But it doesn't do me any good
Love the way they smile at me
Held that face for eternity
Now let them all fly off
When it comes down
It all comes down
You will not be found
When its over
It's all over
Even if I make a sound
I'll be misunderstood
By the beautiful and good in...This city
None of it was planned
Take me by the hand
Just don't try and understand
Try to be misunderstood
Just a product of my childhood
And still I find myself outside
You can't say
I haven't tried
Perhaps I tried too hard
No excuses
I won't apoligise
Or justify your lies
Come find me
Tell them to me
Look me in the eyes
I'll be misunderstood
By the beautiful and good in...This city
None of this was planned
Take me by the hand
Just dont try and understand
Can't forgive sorry to say
You don't know you're guilty anyway
Isn't it funny how we don't speak
The language of love
Think about it!
Extreme Ways
Extreme ways are back again
Extreme places I didn't know
I broke everything new again
Everything that I'd owned
I threw it out the windows, came along
Extreme ways I know apart
The colors of my sea
Perfect color me
Extreme ways that help me
That help me out late at night
Extreme places I had gone
But never seen any light
Dirty basements, dirty noise
Dirty places coming through
Extreme worlds alone
Did you ever like it planned
I would stand in line for this
There's always room in life for this
Oh baby, oh baby
Then it fell apart, fell apart
Oh baby, oh baby
Then it fell apart, it fell apart
Oh baby, oh baby
Then it fell apart, fell apart
Oh baby, oh baby
Like it always does, always does
Extreme songs that told me
They helped me down every night
I didn't have much to say
I didn't get above the light
I closed my eyes and closed myself
And closed my world and never opened
Up to anything
That could get me along
I had to close down everything
I had to close down my mind
Too many things to cover me
Too much can make me blind
I've seen so much in so many places
So many heartaches, so many faces
So many dirty thingsYou couldn't even believe
I would stand in line for this
There's always room in life for this
Oh baby, oh baby
Then it fell apart, fell apart
Oh baby, oh baby
Then it fell apart, it fell apart
Oh baby, oh baby
Then it fell apart, fell apart
Oh baby, oh baby
Like it always does, always does
The Gangbanging Smurfs!
What a weekend it has been? Arriving on Friday night on the island and being picked up by very good firends that I really apreciate, brought back just so much memories and the feeling being back home after a time of absence.
Of course the first stop had to be Buddah! What will the island be without Buddah is genuine one of my first instincts and took total advantage of still getting my beer at discounted rates andof course the climate in Mauritius and being so so thirsty........OK, maybe I'm only looking for excuses, but I missed PHOENIX just so much. The good thing was that I flew from Johannesburg with Air Mauritius and the first thing I asked for when I got on the plane was 2 PHOENIX'es and was that awesome? OK, enough of my absolutely disgusting alcoholic behaviour I went up to meet all the other german buddies at Shez Pepe. I was so excited that I could even eat and Kevin was so kind to finish my and his pizza and afterwards being able to finish my beer as well. Man, It was just so amazing to meet up with these guys and with Uma and it felt like I never left the island at all, just being away on holiday!
Saturday night was quite special in the sense of getting to know some of my good friends better, but I do not want to elaborate very much on this issue for now. Of course, meeting up with Richard and the Italian was also something speacial. Never thought that I could miss the fucking crazy conversation of that crazy mother fucker, but I did! Anyway, to cut a very long story very short, little sleep was planned for my arrival weekend and truthfully I can acknowledge this. Sunday was a planned evening at Domaine Anne for Uma's departure Tuesday morning. Man, was this just so fucking awesome. If good thinks keep on happening here, how will I ever be able to release this fucking shit small island out of my life. Maybe it is a sign for good things to come in the future! So let me explain to you guys everything that happened on this special occasion at DA.
First off, for some reason the germans disappeared with my car. I actually thought they might have received the wrong description of the venue, but I still do not know the whole story. With other words, they were late. Getting joined in with the scenery, setup and our gazebo in the middle of a pond, we all were very excited. But then there was that little indian that basically gave me grieve the whole fucking night calling me a plumber. Bru, what the fuck is wrong with you? So, after enjoying a very good meal, I had the idea of doing something very extrodinary. Playing spin the bottle (truth or dare) on the glass top which turn around on some sort of mechanism on the table to allow for easy reachability of sauces, rice, etc. Burning the one edge of a toothpic which will indicate the person doing the truth or dare and the other edge of the toothpic will point to the person asking or forming embarrasing tasks/questions and this is basically a recipe for real embarracement and it worked. We had Kevin going down on his knees a presenting himself to Kerstin asking her hand in marriage. We had a new american, Jake, asking Nachi to be his husband for the next couple of months. We had Lars doing a streak infront of all guests just to belt level (but it was late and most of the guests had left). We had Nachi growling and barking at the moon on his knees loudly and proudly. We had Joern taking off his shirt and doing some sexual thing rubbing iceblocks all over his body. We had Kevin asking the waiter if he was available next weekend for a date and Lars that needed to back him up when the waiter said no, telling the waiter "Give it to me, Baby". Man, all and all it was an amazing evening celebrating the departure of an amazing woman and friend with the company of a whole bunch of amazing people.
Afterwards we decided to go to Buddah, but fortunatly/unfortunately (depending how you look at it) Buddah was closed, so we stayed at the Germans house and had real hard arguments about politcs, racism, capitalism, sexism, poverty and basically everything that is fucked up in the world today. We soon realised that if I will go to bed that I will not be able to wake up for work at 07:00, so we all decided to stay awake. Man, it is really a hrad day today and I'm planning to go home now and catch an eyeshut. Guys, what an amazing weekend it has been and you all rule. Joel, it was really great to see you again and my full support with the journalism thing. Have fun and enjoy people!
Songs of Saddness!
These 5 songs are probably some of the most saddest songs around, but definately some of my all time favourites.
1. Don't Dream It's Over - Crowded HouseThere is freedom within,
there is freedom without
Try to catch the deluge in a paper cup
There's a battle ahead, many battles are lost
But you'll never see the end of the road
While you're traveling with me
Hey now, hey now
Don't dream it's over
Hey now, hey now
When the world comes in
They come, they come
To build a wall between us
We know they won't win
Now I'm towing my car,
there's a hole in the roof
My possessions are causing me suspicion
but there's no proof
In the paper today tales of war and of waste
But you turn right over to the T.V. page
Now I'm walking again to the beat of a drum
And I'm counting the steps to the door of your heart
Only shadows ahead barely clearing the roof
Get to know the feeling of liberation and relief
Hey now, hey now
Don't dream it's over
Hey now, hey now
When the world comes in
They come, they come
To build a wall between us
Don't ever let them win
2. Easier to Walk Away - Elton JohnEvery turn, you turn around
You wear another face
Every time I look away
I find a harder place
If you knew me like you know him
You know just how I feel
Slipping through somebody’s fingers
Falling onto someone’s grieve
It’s easier to walk away
Better off to face the fact
When love holds you up for ransom
Walk away and don’t look back
Never seen you looking back through
Smiling with added tears
If I knew you were holding on to
Memories and fear
Just release me, I can take it
Can’t you see a change has come?
Strangled by infatuation
Buried under someone’s thumb
It’s easier to walk away
Better off to face the fact
When love holds you up for ransom
Walk away and don’t look back
It’s easier to walk away
Cover it up and paint it black
When love scars you and leave you stranded
Walk away and don’t look back
Every turn, you turn around
You wear another face
Every time I look away
I find a harder place
It’s easier to walk away
Better off to face the fact
When love holds you up for ransom
Walk away and don’t look back
It’s easier to walk away
Cover it up and paint it black
When love scars you and leave you stranded
Walk away and don’t look back
3. I'm Gonna Miss you - Milli Vanilli (even though I was told not to publish it)
I knew it from the start, you would break my heart,
But still I had to play this painfull part.
You wrapped me around your litlle bitty finger
With your magic smile you kept me hanging on
the lovers cross of wild.
You put your spell on me and take my breath away,
But there was nothing I could do to make you stay.
I’m gonna miss you!
All the love I feel for you, nothing could make me change.
I’m going to puke, oh Girl.
I’m gonna miss you, Baby!
Give me all the love I feel for you.
Couldn’t make you change your point of view.
Your leavin’!
Now it seems here, I’m waisting my time
I just don’t know what I should do.
It’s a tragedy for me to say the dream is over and
I never will forget the day we met.
Girl, I’m gonna miss you!
Like a honey bee, you took the best of me.
Now I can’t erase these memories.
Like a fairy tale you are so unveil.
You left a scar so hard to heal.
While you had days of paradise,
Back home home I felt as cold as ice.
I’m gonna miss you!
I’m gonna miss you!
Give me all the love I feel for you.
Couldn’t make you change your point of view.
Your leavin’!
Now it seems here, I’m waisting my time
I just don’t know what I should do.
It’s a tragedy for me to say the dream is over and
I never will forget the day we met.
Girl, I’m gonna miss you!
It’s a tragedy for me to say the dream is over and
I never will forget the day we met.
Girl, I’m gonna miss you!
4. Stay - Shakespear SistersIf this world is wearing thin
And you're thinking of escape.
I'll go anywhere with you
Just wrap me up in chains.
But if you try to go alone
Don't think i'll understand.
Stay with me.
Stay with me.
In the silence of your room
In the darkness of your dreams.
You must only think of me
There can be no in between
When your pride is on the floor
I'll make you beg for more.
Stay with me.
Stay with me.
You'd better hope and pray
That you'll make it safe
Back to your own world.
You'd better hope and pray
That you'll wake one day
In your own world.
Cause when you sleep at night
They don't hear your cries in your own world.
Only time will tell if you can break the spell
Back in your own world.
5. Nothing Compares - Sinead O'ConnorIt's been seven hours and fifteen days
since you took your love away
I go out every night and sleep all day
since you took your love away
Since you been gone I can do what-ever I want
I can see whomever I choose
I can eat my dinner in a fancy restaurantbut nothing,
I said nothing can take away these blues
'cos nothing compares
nothing compares to you
It's been so lonely without U here
like a bird without a song
nothing can stop these lonely tears from falling
tell me baby where did I go wrong?
I could put my arms around every boy I see
but they only remind me of U.
I went to the doctor and guess what he told me
guess what he told mehe said:
"girl U better try to have fun no matter what
U do"but he's a fool
'cos nothing compares
nothing compares to you
All the flowers that U planted mama
in the back yard all died when U went away
I know that living with U baby was sometimes hard
but I'm willing to give U another try
'cos nothing compares
nothing compares to you.
